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Cat Scratch

            

This irritation is sort of like a rash. I kept scratching it to worsen the redness and to create possible long-term wounds. This irritation is my tendency to stick my nose where it doesn’t belong. I’m sure you understand. I’m the type of person that gets easily angered if kept confused and not knowing what is going on. You have to admit, you went behind me before. And I’ve tried to push it all away in hopes that you will never again break my trust. But it seems to be always short-lived. As soon as I regain my trust on you, you seem, I feel, to have broken it again. But I know, it’s because I feel jealous. I blame you for the things I’ve done wrong.

I want to be in control. And when I continue to pursue it, it only keeps me out of control. And you are as stubborn as I am. Everyone knows that two stubborn individuals will never come to an agreement. For the most part, it’s true. We don’t come to a valid agreement every time we fight. No consensus, no sense of listening, no understanding. I’m scared. If we keep this up, I swear, both our irritation will eventually crumble us. We both have our own perspectives but it doesn’t mean that we can’t agree on anything. I don’t want to argue and neither do you.

First things first. Understanding. I’ll change my shut-off method and try to listen to you whenever you have a few words to exchange with me. As much as politicians argue, they still have some set of rules to present their argument without being interrupted constantly. Secondly, consensus. I’m no perfectionist, but I can’t leave an argument in the open. I want to come up with a balanced agreement. I’m sure that there are things we can always agree on, such as, obviously our love. Thirdly, look at that! Love. I want you to see the fact that I love you.

It will take some time before we can put things into this solution. But I think it’s best that we become more open, more linked up. I’m attached to you and there’s nothing wrong with that. It’s because, the rash I’m scratching won’t be cured on any antidote, painkiller, or time to heal. Only you can put me at ease.

Love, Ni

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